27.3.04
Today's kinda screwed. Went from one eatery to another but all of them were closed for today. Sheesh. Every place where i felt like having my lunch at was closed. I wonder what they have against me man....all I asked for was a nice meal. =/
I need to talk to Cindy. There're too many things trapped within me. I need to get them off my chest. SIGH.
den* stepped on your garbage at
I'm taking naps to escape from having to do work. I'm such an escapist. I'm typing a second entry for today because basically, I'm bored to tears and it seems like nobody cares. It's just one of those days when you feel forlorn and lonely. I dont want to do work. I dont have the mood - and that's the lousiest excuse anyone can come up with. So nothing much has happened today. Everything's all quiet and still. My teeth are hurting so bad because Dr Koh did this twist and turn thingy with my braces and the pressure against my teeth is so immense. I feel like eating chocolates but they seem to have disappeared into thin air. I should have bought them when i saw them at Watson's, but I didnt because I thought there would still be some left at home. I just wrote you a letter but I'm feeling no better. I need to get Eugene a present but I have no idea what to get and where to get one from. Tomorrow's Sunday and then Monday comes. I feel like escaping school too. I am so darn upset. I feel like screaming then going to sleep somemore. The previous beautiful Saturday morning entry was a facade. I feel so mentally jaded. I hate people who whine non-stop because they irritate me. Now I'm whining and irritating myself. I feel like using the f-word but no, i shall not.
Damn.
den* stepped on your garbage at
26.3.04
It is a beautiful Saturday morning. Took a long stroll back from the dental clinic and settled down in front of this computer, typing this entry. Just finished an ice-cream cone with a terribly soft cone, but I'm not complaining, since I guess I wouldnt be able to chew off a crunchy one (thanks to the braces-tightening). Vic Chou's idiotic song is playing on the radio but I'm not complaining either. In fact, it sounds more melodious than usual. The rest of the people arent home, and that leaves me and the maid. It is hence, a beautiful Saturday morning. I feel liberated being all alone today, for some inexplicable reason. :)
To Feli, it was a truly moving entry you had at your blog. I'm touched beyond words. You have my best wishes dear. :)
It is such a magical feeling to have someone who truly cares about you and is willing to give so much for you.
Urgh. I want to make a point but I cant seem to bring it across. Nevermind.
There'll be dance party for O2 on Monday. Woots! I cant wait, I cant wait! Miss dancing with Feli...heh. O1's dance parties were so much fun. ;)
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Had Love Matters today. For those who arent aware, Love Matters is this sexuality education programme that the college subjects us to. It is compulsory, so yes, it's dumb. After sitting through countless talks and watching countless videos on sexuality education, it gets pretty dry. Afterall, the information is repetitive. Whatever's been said in one session is echoed in another. The bottomline of every session is simply this - Pre-marital sex is a definite no-no. Regardless of what situation you're caught in, boys and girls, resist. You dont want to end up thinking, 'How could this happen to me?'. What perked me up today though, was a video on abortion. The distorted faces of the suctioned-out fetuses were horrifying. It was really heart-wrenching but I had to admit that it disgusted me so bad that I lost my appetite. =/
Time crawled by today. School ended at around 1pm but it felt as if it'd ended at 7pm or something. -_-
It's the weekend again. I wonder if it's good news or bad.
den* stepped on your garbage at
25.3.04
The truth has come to light and alas, it is the loner who spilled the beans. Oh no, that sounds too nice. He betrayed us. He is (indeed!) the spy. Yeah, that's more like it. Anyway, he eavesdropped on our conversations (and still makes the effort to do so now) and told him everything about what we thought and said behind his back. This is so symbollic of the real world out there. The loner is just one of those stereotypical backstabbers you see in everyday life. Cool.
Typing this entry without any form of visual aid (ie. no spectacles or contact lenses). The reason is that I'm too lazy to get my spectacles out of my bag and I'd rather be half-blind. Dad would shake his head in disapproval if he hears about this. =/
Charmaine helped me cut up my chicken chop today. Hee. It was so nice of her. The girls were saying that she cut it up into pieces that were too small and I had teeth to chew them up myself. Then she started cutting them up into bigger pieces. When i finally got down to eating, I still cut those bigger pieces up into smaller ones by myself. So they say I've got no teeth. Dots! I cant help it if I have a smaller mouth...hah. And yes, the feeling of being waited on is so incredibly shiok! I'm growing to be more and more dependent (but it's quite fun, heh). Now I understand how Pling feels...And Alvin's pampering me like the princess I dream of being and I feel awfully bad about it. I dont recall returning my plate to the stalls for a long time, haha. Oh wells, I want to thank him one of these days.
Doro, if you're reading this, welcome back to sunny Singapore! :D Miss you loads. For some idiotic reason, I missed the times we chewed at each other's arms. Or rather, I missed you chewing at mine. Yeah. (Since I never did bear to sink my teeth into yours, haha). In any case, hope to catch up with you soon dear. :P
den* stepped on your garbage at
23.3.04
Ducro screwed our class damn badly today. Was controlling so hard not to roll my eyes right at him. He droned on and on about our class being insular, socially inept and blah blah blah. The italicised words are the exact ones he used. The only thought that came to mind was, "isnt he the one who's insular AND socially inapt?" And thus, Ducro's supposed pep talk triggered off an entire session of bitching amongst the girls, and well, one or two guys. Apparently, WE are supposed to give in to him, and WE are supposed to be the ones who are in the wrong. Honestly, we've done nothing wrong. But somehow, Ducro seems to be in the midst of some mid-life crisis and is picking on our class for no valid reason. So, whatever. I've already incurred Ducro's wrath before and I'm trying my damnit best not to 'antagonize' him again. He's worse than a bitch. I utterly detest his sarcasm. Asshole.
And guess what? The loner has decided to work for Ducro as his spy! Woots. No wonder Ducro's coming up with all these nonsense and is out to spite us. There's an agreement to overthrow the loner as our assistant CT rep. This sounds a little like the political outbreak Taiwan is going through, haha. All that dirty tricks and power play. This is going to be an interesting show to watch. And it's definitely going to last....sheesh.
School ended early today, at a record-breaking 11:20. It was down to town again. For the third time in two days. We met up with Eeleen and Mark and got our jersey done. Nice jersey...but it's burnt another hole in my pocket. Haix. I spotted a fantastic deal! 90 cents for a pair of earrings. Sucha pity that i dont have earholes...heh. Wished they were selling socks though... :(
den* stepped on your garbage at
22.3.04
I'm supposed to be the usual couch potato at this time of the day. As it is, it's already half past nine. The show's half gone and I'm making an even greater sacrifice by typing this entry. But there's no excuse for not typing one today though, it is one of the milestones of my life! It is by far the sian-est day ive ever had in nj. The closest ones have left, whether for greener pastures or not, and what's left of the interesting people in the class is basically close to zero. The Rockers is now down to Alvin, Felicia and Denise. And if you realise, after subtracting the last name, that's only two others. Even the isolated loner of old is making a concerted effort in his bonding session with the other guys in class today. Basically this sucks. It only serves to lower Alvin's morale and as it is, he's already feeling sore enough about the sudden 'evaporation' of all his buddies. Urgh. Fortunately for his optimism. In fact he seems to be taking the change better than I am. If I recall correctly, he's asked me whether I'm alright more than I have asked him. Now I'm starting to feel the part of a loser. It is only today that I truly felt the severity of the segregation of our class. The situation is so bad that for once, I'm beginning to feel an outcast. The girls form one huge clique and so Felicia and I are left standing alone. Like what she said, we're people of two very different frequencies. It is true! Because regardless of how hard I try to talk to them or even try to fake a smile at their supposed humour, it is still incredulously impossible for me to truly befriend them. At times like these tend to miss my old friends. At least there is no need for any facades or hard feelings. I felt so much like escaping today. It was a damnit drag. For some reason, there's this inexplicable irony behind all this. Let's pray that things will only be better. I hope for new blood in our class next week. Please let there be, firstly, more sociable (but not buaya) guys, and secondly, girls who at least have a vague idea of what Play is. I'm sick of being surrounded by kids and muggers.
SOS.
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